Honne // Tatemae

why hello! It's me. Irene.

So. I decided to make a blog (again) after a long long time of thinking and processing.

Why, you say? To be honest, I'm quite a reserved and sensitive person when it comes to moments... memories... you name it. I would like to remember as much as I could, and when I get older, I would get the chance to look back and simply rewind my life through my writings (in here). I wouldn't call myself a writer, I make mistakes here and there, and I write here not to entertain or please anybody, nor to extend my likings of writing. I simply like to pour things, and here is the perfect platform as in right now.

I don't know where it started, writing somehow makes me a little bit relieved, knowing I can express things I couldn't do with voice, and knowing I can say anything in peace. In silence. And knowing that I could write anything without having to perfect my words is even more relieving.

I'm in the midst of 23 this year, and in this day exactly I would like to reflect all the years gone by, all the good and bad times, all who left, and all who stays. I went to uni for 4 years, stumbled across all the beautiful people's paths, the ones who made me feel like I'm home, and the ones who made me feel worthless.

For these couple of years I've also been learning to actually stand up for myself. To actually know that I don't worth less than any other people in the world. And not to depend my happiness on others.

And why, totemae? Ah I'm gonna explain this once and for all.

I got the inspiration from the word tatemae.

"Honne and tatemae are Japanese words that describe the contrast between a person's true feelings and desires (本音 hon'ne, "true sound") and the behavior and opinions one displays in public (建前 tatemae, "built in front", "façade").

Honne may be contrary to what is expected by society or what is required according to one's position and circumstances, and they are often kept hidden, except with one's closest friends. Tatemae is what is expected by society and required according to one's position and circumstances, and these may or may not match one's honne.

In many cases tatemae leads to outright telling of lies in order to avoid exposing the true inward feelings.

The honne–tatemae divide is considered by some to be of paramount importance in Japanese culture."

Yes I did copy that. The username tatemae is taken so totemae is like a pun and sounds cuter (i do like tote bags).

Enough ramble, I'm getting sleepy already. See you!